


only when i lose myself

by occultdeck



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: M/M, Master/Pet, anyway davesnake is a nasty super freak the end, at some point
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-08
Updated: 2017-04-23
Packaged: 2018-09-30 19:48:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10170491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/occultdeck/pseuds/occultdeck
Summary: Dave did not consider himself in denial, because he was perfectly aware of what was happening. He did not pretend that he hadn't remembered every moment they had spent together, because he knew he remembered every minuscule detail.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> foxhound days solimiller. 199x, you know the drill

No matter how he looked at it, it was weird. It wasn't just fucked up, either. It was fucked up, weird, and against the rules. Listen, Dave thought to himself, trying to explain his situation to a normal person in case the need arose, _I'm not in love with him. I absolutely do not catch myself, nor do others, for that matter, catch me gazing like some kind of lovesick --_  
  
He did. He knew he did, but like hell would he admit it to anyone else on this godforsaken base. Not even the Master himself. Maybe Miller did know, but was he about to ask? Again, absolutely not.

  
Dave did not consider himself in denial, because he was perfectly aware of what was happening. He did not pretend that he hadn't remembered every moment they had spent together, because he knew he remembered every minuscule detail. Dave had indeed memorized every curve and every edge of his Master's body. He only hoped his mentor never noticed when he would cup his face and slowly drag his hand down, caressing his sleeping face. It wasn't anything serious by any stretch. Miller was a very beautiful man, very...aesthetically pleasing. Yes, that was it. That was all it was. That's all it will ever be. David nods at his own thoughts, attempting to reassure himself.

  
-  
  
Kaz had grown to regret many, many things in his life. These days they seemed to pile up exponentially faster than anything else. Did he regret fucking his ex's hot clone son? No, never. The sex was incredible. Consequences? Maybe. He didn't care enough about what happened to him anymore. To be fair, it couldn't get much worse from here.

With what he could see, David was beautiful. Nice features, sure, that goes without saying. The apple didn't fall far from the tree by any means. But the David that nobody else saw, the one begging for more from his Master was something special for sure, a spectacle for his eyes alone. Miller recalled the previous night, David's hot flushed face, his lips slightly parted, taking it all while he riding him- Kaz pushed up his glasses, releasing an exasperated sigh, mostly directed at himself for being so shameless. The man continued his brisk walk across the base with yet another file full of of bullshit papers, outwardly annoyed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kaz musing about his student

Kaz returned to his office, the metal door opening with the usual click. Alone once again, he made a mental note to himself to do something about how cold it was. More papers had made their way to his desk somehow. He sighed as he returned to his office chair.

Immediately he felt his thoughts wander to David. Miller shook his head at himself for being unable to draw the line between personal and business life once again. Initially, even looking at the younger man had filled him with an insurmountable anger, he had looked so much like his father. Seeing him as frequently as he did in training had helped desensitize him to his face, however. The more time he had spent around him, the sooner he rationalized that they were completely different, no matter how similar they looked.

For starters, David was much smaller. While he certainly had a toned body for his age, he was slimmer than Big Boss's bulky older body. It would come with time for sure. He wasn't exactly innocent or particularly naive, but he hadn't reached the Boss's level of cosmic jadedness. This, too, would come with time, if he decided to stay in this line of work. Kaz hoped he wouldn't.

He truly had a different aura than the Boss as well. Of course, Big Boss had an air of importance, his presence was more intense than most. His student was a different story entirely. He knew he was significant to FOXHOUND, even talented, but never acted like it. In private, he could get cocky but not overly so. Miller always put him in his place when he got rash. Even though David's grin when he saw an opening was incredibly endearing, a good CQC-induced knockout gets the job done.

For Miller, brooding at his desk with steepled fingers and glaring at nothing in particular was incredibly ordinary. The usual Tuesday evening. And Wednesday. Thursday? Oftentimes, he didn't realize he was doing it. A specific knock pulled him out of his musing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *slides up* we meet again, im sorry it's been so long ;v;  
> HELLO!! oh my god. thank you all so much!? i appreciate the comments and kudos sooo much I am Melting!! IM A LITTLE EMOTIONAL im sorry this chapter didn't have much substance to it but i wanted to bring something rather than nothing after getting so many replies ;v; i had initially made this as one large chapter but i split it into two parts, which im almost done with so ill post it soon *thumbs up* i hope this wasn't too disappointing hehe


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG I GET NERVOUS ABOUT...WRITING.....anyway GETTING TO THE NSFW CONTENT im sorry in advance aaaa;;;;
> 
> edit 6/4/17: HEY im still alive, sorry for vanishing! i polished this chapter up a bit and im working on the next one, thanks for yr patience <3

It was an unspoken gesture they had. It eased the irritation that came about when someone knocked on his door. However, he didn't come around too often on of his own volition. Sure, he came on his own time to time to say hello, to check on him, maybe. He didn't care, did he? David wasn't the opportunistic type. 

  
"Come in, David."

  
The door clicked open once again and creaked as Snake gingerly opened the door. "Master?"

  
David smiled a bit right when he laid his eyes on him. Miller almost scoffed at how similar he was to a goddamn dog, but found it the slightest bit endearing.  
He was in his usual workout getup, navy blue tank, black shorts, ever present traces of sweat.

  
_Fuck. Don't do this._

  
"It's nice to see you. What brings you here?" Miller remained at his desk, clearly preoccupied.

  
Dave was doing that thing again where he stood awkwardly by the door until Miller beckoned him over. He pulled out the chair next to his and patted it gently.

  
"Come on, sit."

  
David immediately sat down, his body turned to face his mentor.

"Hey, I, uh. I didn't come for any reason in particular...I hope I'm not bothering you." He managed a half-smile at his mentor.

Miller gives him a cynical "heh" type of laugh while filling more forms at a relaxed pace. Bothering, he thought to himself, more insecure about coming here, it seemed like. He then gave the man another brief look.

His blue gaze was spacey as he watched his mentor go about a more monotonous aspect of his job. His face had the faintest blush, likely from his daily exercise routine, Miller noted, making his best attempt to fool himself. His full, perfect lips were slightly parted, his clothes faintly sticking to his toned body with the scent of sweat. His usually stylish hair was tousled, few strands stuck to his forehead.

This, even though Miller refused to admit it to himself, was anything but a brief look and was nothing short of staring, almost admiring.

Fucking hell, he looked so hot. He was so goddamned hot. Was this normal? Miller was pretty sure he was normally this hot. Even so, David was unusually downcast. He sat in the more relaxed position that he often melted into when they were alone, with one of his knees up but was resting on his elbow on top of it. He seemed tired.

Miller grabbed his chin and tilted it upwards to force Dave to look at him head-on, making him jump from the contact. His eyes were wide in surprise, locking eyes with his master. He wasn't blushing, was he? No, no. Unlikely. He let go and turned away from David, signing off on the last few papers for the day.

  
David shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He said nothing, but the tenting of his pants was very telling. Even though he had barely laid a finger on him. Christ. Miller almost smirked, not even bothering to turn back to his student.

  
"You seem to have quite the issue there already, hmm? It's only been a week, sweetheart."

  
Kaz ran the tips of his fingers over David's fly. Their eyes met, and Snake swallowed thickly, desperation in his eyes. Miller palmed at his erection, still in its confines, much to David's dismay. He sighed gently, arousal overtaking him.

  
"Please. Master, is it okay?"

  
Kaz nodded slowly, without breaking eye contact. Maybe he was going too soft on the boy. Almost mechanically, immediately upon receiving his approval, the younger man removed his shorts and folded them. Clad only in his navy blue tank and black boxers, he awaited further instructions. His expression behind his aviators was indiscernible as usual. Miller hummed in approval.

  
"Good. You may sit again."

  
David lowered himself back to his previous position, clearly still bothered. He could have even been sweating a bit. Miller kneeled in front of him, agonizingly slowly sliding his shorts off. David sighed at the new contact with his dick painfully swollen. Kaz smiled a little.  
"Oho, is this for me?" Kaz ran one finger from the base to the tip, with his student's cock twitching. David bit at his lip, pained. He nodded.

  
"I'm honored."

  
David attempted to smile fondly at his Master, but him being clearly still hot and bothered showed through more than anything else. Miller removed his glasses and replaced them on his desk, the usual prelude. Kaz gripped David's thighs only hard enough to steady himself. He traced his mess of a student's length with his tongue before bringing himself to the head of his cock, flicking his tongue over the slit. David's breath hitched. Miller took the entirety of him in his mouth, making a pleased hum while David relaxed enough to sit back with his head tilted. David moaned softly, relishing the warm wetness. His mentor was quite the sight, taking him like this. He relished it, burning the image into his brain. His eyebrows furrowed in concentration, cheeks hollowed as he sucked intently, creating a nice rhythm.

  
David brought a hand to his head, running his hands as much as the few loose strands coming out of his ponytail allowed, sighing. Kaz made quick work of him, he was already panting, sighs accentuated, hissing "master"s under his breath. David's face was totally flushed, his legs shaking. Miller took note, quickened his pace, and began swallowing.

  
This was too much for the David. The hot tightness, the Hellmaster in such a vulnerable position, making noises with that level of depravity was enough -- could have been enough, he knew it was coming. Miller dug his nails into his thighs, and god it was all he had ever needed. Miller knew this all too well. He called out for his master again, and again.  
Dave almost whined as he came hard, his cock jerked, jerked again, and his mentor, ever so dutifully, took it all. He almost looked like he enjoyed swallowing underneath his demeanor. He did. A barely audible soft wet pop filled the brief silence as Kaz removed his student from his mouth gracefully.

  
Snake looked almost serene above him. He looked dazed, but caressed Kaz's face, bringing him into a kiss that was almost unusually tender considering the type of relationship they had. It was gentle, lacking the usual feverishness. David's lips were delicate and smooth when they had met with his master's. They were rough, almost pained. They broke away; David smiled softly at him. Miller was almost embarrassed for him as he pushed down on the boy's leg to bring himself up, and then his desk to allow him to return to his usual intimidating stature.

The older man coughed, clearing his throat, straightened his ponytail, wiped off his mouth. David had scarcely redressed himself before he was dismissed. He nodded, still trying to get the remainder of his pants on.

  
"Th-thank you, Master." he smiled sheepishly, which Kaz raised an eyebrow at but had no interest in questioning further.  
The door closed, and brooding Hellmaster had returned, scolding himself for having made yet another mistake.


End file.
